We’re venturing a little outside of my usual territory here, but let’s just pretend it’s tangential to my love of monster movies and roll with it.
For whatever reason – alignment of the stars, a stray cosmic breeze, the stewardship of angels, global climate change, renewed influx of hard drugs from our South American suppliers – Americans are back to the business of witnessing and documenting the existence of creatures previously believed to not exist. And when I say back to business, Diane, I mean it. We are working HARD at this shit.
To wit: two men have found a Bigfoot corpse! And stuffed it in a freezer, and taken a photo of it! Naturally these men are ‘foot-hunting rednecks and known hoaxers. But I am nevertheless convinced that this thing that looks like a Halloween costume is actually an ice-cold Bigfoot. Because if we can’t believe these guys, who have nothing at all to gain from presenting a hoax-foot to the world (except of course media attention and maybe a book deal), who can we believe?
Well – maybe we can believe the policeman and Texas civilian/rancher who saw a chupacabra taking a run and killed a chupacabra for sucking chicken blood, respectively! I am deeply interested in this Mexican legend sprung to life, and see no chance that either of these creatures might be a weird-looking dog or a coyote with mange. DNA tests be damned! And get away from my livestock, fuckers!
What does this mean for the future? Well, all I can say for myself is that I’m pretty sure the following picture is real.